About Abdul Wahood

Abdul is a Muslim man who came to America seeking hot, sexy blondes but found only fat, flatulent pigs. He writes under his American name Ferdinand Bardamu at In Mala Fide and In Bona Fide.

InFATdels, Meet Your New Friends Ana And Mia

There is no God but Allah, blessed be His name, but when it comes to the inFATdels, I’m willing to compromise if it gets them to shed the blubber. Enter the phenomenon of “pro-ana”:

Pro-ana refers to the promotion of the eating disorder anorexia nervosa. It is often referred to simply as “ana” and is sometimes personified by anorexics as a girl named Ana. The lesser-used term pro-mia refers likewise to bulimia nervosa and is sometimes used interchangeably with pro-ana.

Pro-ana organizations differ widely in their stances. Most claim that they exist mainly as a non-judgmental environment for anorexics; a place to turn to, to discuss their illness, and to support those who choose to enter recovery. Others deny anorexia nervosa is a mental illness and claim instead that it is a “lifestyle choice” that should be respected by doctors and family.

Pro-ana websites and forums are dedicated to helping women lose weight and get sexy by providing dieting advice, tips on suppressing hunger pangs, and helping them deal with the resentment and disapproval of their fat friends and family members. They also “thinspire” girls by posting pictures of skinny, attractive women.

As a lover of petite, submissive women, I consider pro-ana to be a positive development. In a world in which the crushing bulk of fat girls has blotted out the sun, one ray of light has snuck past to illuminate the darkness. Naturally, Western governments, in thrall to the Fat Satan, are against it:

In the United Kingdom, 40 MPs signed an early day motion tabled in February 2008 by the Liberal Democrats member for Cheadle, Mark Hunter, urging government action against pro-ana sites. The motion was timed to coincide with the UK National Eating Disorder Awareness Week.

In April 2008, a bill outlawing material which “provokes a person to seek excessive thinness by encouraging prolonged restriction of nourishment” was tabled in the French National Assembly by UMP MP Valérie Boyer. It imposes a fine of €30,000 and two years imprisonment (rising to €45,000 and three years if there was a resulting death) on offenders. Health minister Roselyne Bachelot, arguing for the bill, stated that “giving young girls advice about how to lie to their doctors, telling them what kinds of food are easiest to vomit, encouraging them to torture themselves whenever they take any kind of food is not part of liberty of expression.” The bill passed the National Assembly, but stalled in the Senate, where a June 2008 report by the Committee of Social Affairs emphatically recommended against such legislation and instead suggested early-screening programs by schools and physicians.

This is disgusting. How dare these jealous swine try to intimidate girls who want to look good for their men! Fortunately, none of these pro-fatty measures have succeeded… yet.

So inFATdels, if you want us to stop taunting you, if you want to attract a man who doesn’t smell like B.O. and microwavable tacos, make Ana or Mia your new best friend. Neither one will let you down, steer you wrong, or hurt you. To those who will curse me for encouraging eating disorders, I say that being stick-skinny beats being fat by a long haul. On a 1-10 scale of male arousal, where 10 is a stainless steel, full-height erection and 1 is a soft thimble, the average emaciated runway model is a 4 while the average fat girl is a 5i. That’s right — fat chicks are so repulsive, so boner-killing that using imaginary numbers is the only way to quantify their attractiveness.

I’ll end this post with a thinspirational picture:

By the way, Alessandra Ambrosio is pregnant with her second child. All the “waifish” models you mock are either happily married to great men and having kids or close to it. Think about that as you sit in your apartment alone shoving Haagen-Dazs in your maw, fatties.

Have A Miserable Christmas, InFATdels!

Being a devout Muslim, I do not celebrate heathen holidays like Christmas. Nonetheless, as a man of good taste, I enjoy music from all corners of the globe… except when fat girls are singing:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CMZiR1fIfGU

A heffalump lies in on a tacky couch like a cow on the slaughterhouse conveyor belt, wobbling her stomach rolls as if she were a stripper working the pole. God strike me down now. Her singing talent is perfectly matched to her physical fitness — she’s off-key, can’t stay in time, and can’t carry a tune to save her inFATdel life.

Remembering my holy duty, I left this comment on the video under the handle “Betawulf”:

LMAO at this oinker, let’s play Spot the Cliches:

Endless stomach rolls
Cellulite-ridden thighs
Pasty skin
Shapeless face
Thin lips
Dorky glasses
Unwarranted self-importance
Horrible off-key singing

All you’re missing is a plate of donuts to snack on.

As of this writing, she has yet to approve my truthful words. Her fat girl ego must be crushed. This is a perfect opportunity, my brothers — swarm BBW Little Lin’s video and downvote her into oblivion. Bring God’s wrath upon the blasphemers!

You Have A Holy Duty To Make Fat Girls Cry

Allahu akbar, my femininity-loving brothers.

As you all know, the reason why the plague of obesity and boorishness that afflicts American women even exists is because fat girls simply aren’t shamed enough. Every day I feel like Captain Ahab, surrounded by all these white whales. They tell me that “big is beautiful” and that they’d “rather be happy than skinny.” I try and explain to them that all the fat girls I’ve ever known were as happy as stroke victims (which is how a great many of them will end up in a few years), but I can only stand being within five feet of a fatty for so long before the sweat and smegma stench makes me retch. Point being that there’s not enough people kicking these butterballs in their exponentially expanding asses and embarrassing them into thinness.

But to hear the fatties say it, the occasional barb of cruelty they have to endure is just too much for them to bear. They have the chutzpah to claim that fat people are already harassed enough! Don’t believe me? See this pouty blog post:

Newsflash dude – there is not a fat person in this culture who hasn’t heard this before.  There are very few fat people who haven’t heard it in the last two hours.  We know what you think of us.  We are all too aware that you let your assumptions run wild and then treat us like your assumptions are true. We are aware that you think “Fat bad, thin good, shame the fatties grunt grunt grunt”. We hear this message about 386,170 times every year.  I’ve been fat for 17 years, which means I’ve heard it around 6,564,890 times.  How can you possibly think that hearing it 6,564,891 times is going to improve my life?  Are you also planning to win a land war in Russia?  Being 6,564,891 does not make you special or brave, it makes you one more doody in a big pile of crap.

Fatsos get shamed 386,170 times a year? That’s a total lie, but it’s still a pretty scientific-sounding number and probably took our flatulent heroine some time to come up with. Time she COULD have spent losing the weight and NOT having to be shamed for being obese ever again! Instead, she spent that time adding up a meaningless number like an Aspie kid counting tiles in the linoleum floor at Price Chopper. At least the Aspie has an excuse for being retarded.

Maybe you aren’t aware of this because you aren’t fat so you don’t notice.  Maybe you are aware and this is all an exercise to stroke your massive ego by being the person to save the fatty.  Or maybe it just makes you feel good to treat people like crap.  I don’t really care because bullying is inappropriate in any guise.   If someone is interested in hearing your “tough” talk I’m sure you’ll be among the very first people to know and then let ‘er rip, otherwise how about you sit down and shut up.

Or maybe we find you disgusting and we want you to stop polluting our line of sight, and deporting your diabetic bulk to a village in Africa isn’t an option. The eternal narcissism of the fatso on display again. “Rather than conform to the values of my society, I’m going to stomp my foot and scream and DEMAND everyone accept my dysfunctional behavior! Waaaah!”

Or you could swim against the stream and treat fat people like the intelligent human beings we are- not like confused sheep who need your strong guidance – and encourage others to do the same.  Let there be a fat person who only hears 386,169 messages about their body because you refused to pile on the shame and body hate.  That’s brave.

So damn intelligent you fat fucks are — so smart, you’ve ensured that you’ll suffer the rest of your life with chronic health problems and social ostracism, all because you can’t go on a diet and pick up a pair of barbells.

There. I hope that made you cry. Go stuff your face in a pint of Cherry Garcia, lardlog.

This is a reminder, my brothers — every day, you must go out of your way to make fat girls miserable and unhappy. Remind them that they’re ugly, that they’re going to die young, that you’d rather fuck a goat than accept a blowjob from one of them. If you haven’t made at least one fat girl a day squirt tears of unfathomable sadness, you have failed in your duty to God. Your quest for more beautiful, submissive American women begins today.